Love in Lockdown

We met in January over an online dating app. Yes, an online dating app that is quite trending these days. Well, I was always very apprehensive about using such apps because I believed people are using it only for hook-ups, but then some of my wise colleagues and friends advised me to give it a try and well, I did, and I did well!

He in his early 40s was so charming; well-maintained beard, leather jacket, fancy bike, and those boots with the background of Leh Ladakh just blew my mind. I always admired rough and dusky guys, and well he is 6 feet tall too. I couldn’t stop myself from swiping him right. Well I guess, he was waiting right there as he immediately responded, as a result, we both matched, and started to interact and later exchanged numbers.

We mostly fought over calls because of his obvious behavior of pulling my leg and teasing me for stupid things constantly. I am not good at talking sweet stuff with guys and taking their shit; well, of course, I am 38 and I have turned dumb at romance and sweet talks with time. Maybe that’s gross but this is what he has been pointing at, as per him I am getting OLD and no way I should ever think of marriage. Yes, that comment made me super upset as I always wanted to get married and have a family; absolutely like a typical Indian girl.

One day I almost blocked him, but then unblocked immediately. I am not someone who would like to run away from people and do childish stuff like, blocking. I thought of telling him on his face that I DO NOT LIKE THE WAY YOU TALK TO ME. Guess what, I did, and I told him this, and not just this, but everything I had in my mind and scolded him for good 15mins and to my surprise he was listening to me very patiently and soon after my pause, he answered “ARE YOU DONE YET!”… Ghosh!!!... I took a deep breath and realized that he is going to say ‘goodbye’ to me and yes he almost did. But before he could utter a word, I told him “see this is how I am and I’ve been tolerating all your jokes but then I thought to confront you, so if you do not want to talk to me any further, it's ok, I don’t mind”…. I said this in one breath, as if I was trying to hold his words before he could say “Good Bye!”… but a man in 40s must be very patient as he said “well, you are right, I will think about it, and tell me how was your day today?” and of course I melted, I was like how could he not react to all my anger??? But he did and that moment I realized he is going to be my friend for life.

Things turned better post that and we almost completed two months of our friendship and then… then a deadly virus started to hit India. We decided to meet before it could get worse but destiny… we could not meet due to my office and his continuous travel and soon the complete lockdown was announced in Delhi NCR.

We used to talk over video call almost every day and gradually realized that the lockdown might get extended and hell… how will we meet now…? We both silently looked at each other on call and could sense that our eyes are exchanging feelings, suddenly we both smiled at each other and hung up the call. We became very good friends, no, I feel more than just friends

We didn’t speak to each other for two good days like shy teenagers, yes two days was a good time for us to realize, that; what if we don’t get to see each other? What if this is an end to this world? my heart started to sink and the moment I picked up my phone to write him a message I could see he is also typing something.. I waited for his text first, and there I realized that the virus is killing us as he wrote “I wish…” those two words and my heart skipped a beat, there were butterflies in my stomach, I took a deep breath and replied, “me too…”.

I guess the lockdown brought both good and bad news in our lives when we realized we are more than friends now and now we can’t meet until the lockdown is over. We shall meet soon

-Pooja Agarwal